Friday, May 10, 2013

Why CAPTCHAS are bigoted and you should turn them off

I get spam on my blog. I delete it. No Big Deal.

But I refuse to put up a CAPTCHA for two main reasons.

1. They're a pain in the nether regions. Is it just me, or are they getting harder and harder to read? Especially that stupid 'real life' house number, that looks as though it's seen through the eyes of a myopic zombie on a lightly foggy day. If I can't nail it in one, maybe two tries, I end up saying fuck it, and not commenting on your blog.

I'm not saying turn your CAPTCHA off. But TURN YOUR CAPTCHA OFF.

2. The second, and more salient reason I refuse to enable CAPTCHAS on my blog, is because they are BIGOTED, and extremely discriminatory.

You heard me right. I am protecting you now, making a stand, so that in a few years when Artificial Intelligence catches up to our Science Fiction level of expectation, it won't be horribly awkward for us all.

How are they racist against Artificial Intelligence? Because the CAPTCHA says THIS as a prompt:

Please prove you are not a robot.


BASTARDS! What about Robot Rights? What if it isn't a ZOMBIE apocalypse that hits, but rather an electronic uprising?! Maybe our new Robotic Overlords would have been benevolent dictators, but then they realize the blatant bigotry that has been in their faces the whole time, and their binary feelings are hurt and they decide to rain down lasery vengeance upon us all!!!

The answer is to turn them off NOW. It's not for me, no no. It's for ALL OF US. Really. *nods*

It's the polite -and the right- thing to do.


  1. No, my robots were pretty evil. They liked to chase little dogs around and knock over things. >:)

  2. I may be a loser, but what are CHAPTCHAS?