People ask me quite frequently why I don't hit on certain subjects – politics, religion, etc. Sure they're important, but they're too easy and have been done to death. The main reason I avoid those topics is because they can't be done properly from a one sided point of view. I'd have to write a friggin essay about them, and people would still write big fucking letters bitching to me how they think I'm wrong. An opinion isn't wrong – it's an opinion. It may be in bad taste, politically incorrect, uneducated, ill informed, made prematurely and with undue haste – but an opinion is an opinion.
That said here are some important things I feel the need to discuss. Two little lists for your enjoyment. One of things I could do with less of, and two – things I'd like to see more of...
Things I could do with less of...
1.The expression – ____ is the new ____. And the people who say this. Things are what they are. Why does everything have to be something else? The little black dress has always been black, and thirty is only ever going to be thirty. Fuck.
2.EMO anything. Everyone feels sad when they're going through teenage hormones. It's called adolescence. Get a fucking hobby or job – snap out of it. There's no need to make a sub culture out of it.
3.Products that can't just have one use. Cell phones now are computers, phones, mp3's, radio's, alarms, GPS, camera's. Fuck. They hose you on the add-ons. If I want a camera I'll buy a camera. There's just more to go wrong when you complicate the equation.
4.Jeans with holes in them – at the store. Thanks fuckhead. I am buying new jeans because mine have holes in them already. If I want holes I can make them myself. How about this – I'll sell you my old jeans that have holes in them, and you give me a pair before you distress the shit out of them. Everybody wins.
5.People afraid to age. Here's a shock – it happens to everyone. Accept it and deal with it – quit injecting shit into your face.
6.People who obsess over their lawns. Who decided that the perfect lawn should look like a carpet – all mechanical, and cold, and unnatural – devoid of personality? Personally I like it a little wild. It's nature damn it.
Things I'd like to see more of...
1.Velcro on shoes. Hmm – actually velcro anything. I love that shit – it's magical.
2.People who sing/ dance in public – but not on a stage. Just average people shaking their asses to music only they can hear, if only to scare the yuppy fucks around them. This doesn't include people who forget to take their meds. If it isn't intentional - it isn't funny.
3.Products that actually do what they claim they can. It shouldn't be a big surprise when something does what it says it's going to. Thanks magic eraser for keeping your promise.
There's more, but you get the gist. Let me know what some things you'd like to see more of, or things you could do without. I'd better make the see more of list... Hahaha.
Fade to black...
No comments:
Post a Comment